Act your age, will ya?

Dearest members of the general public without toddlers,

Please stop expecting adult behavior out of my 19 month old. He acts his age. He is 30 pounds of non-stop, into everything, jabbering, squealing, mess-making, precocious energy. And I wouldn’t have him any other way.  Scowling at us in aisle 4 as he reaches for things and screeches “MIIIINE, MIIIIIIIIINE” will not make him grow up or shut up by aisle 6. Promise. In fact, he doesn’t even notice (or care) that you disapprove of him eating the crackers I just placed in the cart before we’ve paid for them. I thought it was an improvement over the two coupons he ate in the produce section. So don’t act like your bag of grapes isn’t a few ounces lighter at checkout than when you first selected it! Should you have the inclination to invite us over and you don’t want him to touch your things, don’t leave them in his reach. Toddlers are curious, and decidedly not gentle. This is why my coasters are cork and not stoneware. If you want him quieter, do us all a favor and lead by example. I know better than to take him into a fancy restaurant on a Saturday night at 8PM and request chicken fingers with ketchup. I’m in the Red Robin years. I get it.  Now try and be understanding that kids are kids, (read: kids are annoying), and that the supermarket is not the Ritz, nor is it a good choice for your own personal quiet time.

Thanks.

The “little terror’s” mother

PS- Your teenager is no more of a peach, trust me.

Mommy's little cherub

Dear parents of now grown kids and young adults,

I’m sorry I glared at you and your whiny toddler in Farm Fresh, Applebees, or wherever else I ignorantly expected your 2 year old to sit still and act like an adult. I didn’t know shit about shit.

Love,

Deborah

About dramafreemama

I am a wife, homeowner, teacher, sister, pet-owner, and friend...But the most humbling and moving role in my life to date is that of a mother, or better yet, a MOMMY. We live in a rural area of Virginia and we keep it simple. This blog is about juggling life in all these different roles. Please subscribe/follow and ENJOY!
This entry was posted in Child behavior, Family, Motherhood, Parenting, The public, Toddlers. Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Act your age, will ya?

  1. Heather Cadorette says:

    Damn straight!!

  2. Crystal says:

    Hahaha I’m guilty of glaring at rowdy kids…oh how I have learned! :)

  3. DJ WEINSTEIN MD says:

    My Bad!!! As’PopPop’ to the ‘ZacAttack’ I am entitled to my own special perspective! I will ALWAYS expect the same level of superior performance from my beautiful, handsome grandson that his mother, my loving, superior daughter always gave & continues to give @ work, home, & play!!!
    You go, Zacman!! If I can’t handle the decibel heat level in your kitchen I’ll pop out the hearing aids & sit there grinning like senility is a life style.
    Luv-n-stuf,
    D.O.D.

  4. Cynthia says:

    Love it! I got my-self a sitter for those days my-self! But I am understanding now and I will smile at you and your little terror!

  5. Cynthia says:

    PS I see you got your wit from your D.O.D.

  6. Victoria says:

    I feel your pain. Before I had kids I always used to wonder why parents did not keep their kids under control in restaurants. After having my first son we went out for dinner during his potty training stage and had the most embarrassing experience. I will spare you the details but I will say it was so bad that now the only time the kids come out to dinner is if there birthday falls on a weekday. Thanks for linking up at #ThrowbackThursdayLP.

  7. lol – I love the way you wrote this in letter-form. Your son ate two coupons!!!! lol…I’m sorry, but that is too amusing.

  8. Love it!! There were many times when my son was younger that this would have been perfect to print out and hand over!

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