Inspiring Blogger Award! WOOHOO!

This week, my blog was given the “Very Inspiring Blogger Award” award by Linda’s Corner , creator of the Baby in Bloom website. Thank you so much, Linda! I am beyond flattered to be included, as I love being a part of the “Mom-Blogging” community! There are just so many cool people to connect with that love doing what I love doing– being a parent!

Anyway, this award comes with the following rules:

Keeping the “Blogosphere” a beautiful place…

1. Display logo on blog.  (TA-DA) –>
2. Link back to the person you have so inspired. (See above!)
3. Tell 7 things about yourself.
4. Nominate 15 other bloggers and link back to them. (Holy shit, 15?)
5. Perform 1 random act of kindness and include it in your post.

My 7 things:

♥ In my early twenties, I vehemently expressed that I DID. NOT. WANT. CHILDREN. I said this often and with fervor. I was mistaken. My son, (and VERY soon to be 2 sons,) are the air I breathe and the ground under my feet.

Somebody is getting promoted to big brother very soon!

♥ I don’t like television. [GASP!] Programs worth my time and mental fortitude are such a rarity these days that I don’t even bother. Except for “Good Luck Charlie.” That shit’s funny.

♥ I am somewhat of a social media junkie… I realize this sounds contradictory (and maybe even hypocritical) following my soapboxy sounding item #2. You’re thinking, social media can’t be any more worthwhile than TV shows, right?  You’re right. It’s not. I don’t care. Tweet me, baby! @1dramafreemama

♥ I’m hopelessly cheap, and yet too busy (read:lazy) to be a good couponer. I have not yet solved this enigma.

♥ I am a terrible procrastinator (or an excellent one, depending on your perspective) when it comes to shit I don’t wanna do, especially school work. (grading papers etc.) I will find a million other things I “need” to do to avoid a stack of essays to score or a pile of paperwork to complete. As in, I “need” to pin 87 baby outfits…

This is my bearded hubby… he’s mine.

♥ Some of my weaknesses/addictions include: A good clearance sale (Oh, Zulily, you just get me!) Sweet Frog (Because it’s damned delicious.) A well-groomed beard. (SEXYYYY.) Good manners. (This will never go out of style for me.)

♥ I’ve been told that I am “creative and resourceful in the kitchen”… Translation: I’m a decent cook. I occasionally share recipes under the tab dramafreeRECIPES above! Most of them are fast, cheap, and easy… that is entirely coincidental, and not a reflection of my character. No really.

My 15 “Inspiring Blogger” nominees… in no particular order:

1. Their World We Live in
2. Tanis Miller
3. Real Young Housewife of Southern VA
4. Baby In Bloom
5. The Shitastrophy
6. Spit-up in the Suburbs
7. Crazy Dad Life
8. This Is Mommyhood
9. Momma’s Bacon
10. Chockababy
11. Let Me Start By Saying
12. Moms Who Drink and Swear
13. Sisterhood of the Sensible Moms
14. Bad Parenting Moments
15. Poop on My Hands

It’s hard to give a “shout-out” to just 15… as the mom and dad blogging community has grown to be this enormous family of awesomeness. But these blog sites are where my mind (and my browser!) goes when it wanders away from work… check them out! For laughs, for parenting advice and tips, for sharing what we can all relate to… doing the best we can as parents.

My random act of kindness:

I treated my dad and his lady friend to ice cream…

Yesterday at our local Sweet Frog™ yogurt shop, the owners of the franchise donated their profits to a local family who just lost their daughter in a terrible car crash. The line was out the door, down the sidewalk, and wrapped around the building… continuously from early afternoon until 10pm. Although I didn’t know the beautiful girl I saw in pictures all around the shop where she used to work, I felt honored to be there with her friends, schoolmates, and pretty much the whole community of our small town, and to be part of the fundraising efforts for her family. I read today where the total was somewhere around $8000. (WOW, that’s a lot of sprinkles!) I know money can’t resolve her family’s grief, but it was still a beautiful gesture on the part of the franchise owners in honor of their former employee.

Rest in Peace, Savannah.

Stuff I don’t understand…

I realize that the collection of things I don’t understand could fill a book (or series of volumes even) rather than a simple blog post… But this will have to do at present. Perhaps I will write a book when I actually feel like I understand more shit… Anyway… Lately I find myself so often saying “I just don’t get it” and so I need to air a few things. Right now.

Here is a list of some things that make no sense to me… In no particular order.

One- The capacity for human cruelty that we are all faced with every day, every time we turn on a news station or unfold a newspaper. Bombings… shootings… child abuse… bullying… and the countless other ways in which man mistreats other man (and animals) on a daily basis. I need not even provide examples. You’re surrounded by it too… and probably just as baffled as I.

Two- Where are the mommies and daddies? Teaching eleventh grade for the ninth year in a row, I am appalled at the appearance (not to mention demeanor) of some children. Hey 16 year old girl with a skirt on the size of a sheet of loose-leaf paper… PLEASE tell me your parents did not see you when you left the house this morning– And that this is solely YOUR bad judgement  as a teen, and not theirs as adults. PS-Aren’t you cold? PSS- Everyone can see your vagina.

This is not a prom dress. It is half of one. And you are a whore.

Three- Justin Bieber. Seriously, good opinion or bad, (Belieber or Non-Belieber?) — why does everyone care so damned much what this kid says and does? His impact canNOT  be that significant. Pipe the fuck down, people. He’s 19. He acts 19. He just happens to have a singing career. (WHY he has a singing career also remains a mystery.)

Seriously though, why do these exist? (To be fair, I linked to the Etsy shop where you can buy them… for you Beliebers. LOL.)

Four- A mommy can catch  an ailing child’s puke in her bare hands and not bat an eye (Trust me, I did this yesterday)… but a week-old sippy cup that started off as milk will bring her to her dry-heaving knees. Every time.

To open and pray for stale juice… or to chuck it and cut my losses?

Five- How a toddler can watch the same [crappy] movie over and over again… actually DEMAND to… and not get sick of it. Seriously, I’m ready to set glue traps for Alvin, Simon, & Theodore.

Worst movie ever. Seriously I want to murder it. Twice.

Six- Algebra. For real, that shit’s still hard.

For real.

Ok, so this started off serious… and I fully intended to express myself maturely today. ( No really, I swear! ) But it seems I got progressively smartassier as I continued… Alas, still stuff I don’t understand.

Coming right along…

I’ve never participated in a “Wordless Wednesday” post before–but seeing as my 34 week mama brain is not going to permit much else today, I thought I’d share a few photo collages I created using PicMonkey… a website that allows you to assimilate your own photos into cute collages. Totally free! (Unless you upgrade to get all the fancy schmancy layouts.)

Anyway… here’s me/us at 33 and 34 weeks, respectively. Baby ______ (we are still keeping his name a secret for now) is growing like crazy. Nevermind the babies also developing in my bra…

My little family is growing by one in about 7 more weeks…

I seriously love these 2 guys so much, it is hard to imagine that I am going to have another huge burst of love very soon!

The back yard at my daddy’s house where I grew up… home is where the heart is…

We don’t have to talk about how cold I was… Or that Zac nearly fell in. Ha!

Me being a nerdball in my classroom today… (34 weeks! EEEP!) #photobooth #Macbook

 

Happy Hump Day, or Wordless Wednesday, or Midweek, or whatever you prefer to call it… the operative word is HAPPY.

 

Spring Christmas?

Easter baskets are like Christmas stockings with a handle. Except the candy is egg and bunny-shaped instead of snowman and Santa-shaped. Some edible goodies, a trinket or two, NOTHING “MAJOR.” That’s pretty much it. But recently, parents are getting the wrong idea and turning Easter into spring Christmas… Ahem–I am barely recovered from actual Christmas! So may I please take pause to say, “You’re doing it wrong.”

Upon reading a post from a fellow mom-blogger over at Mommifried, I learned that I am not alone in this sentiment! So who is perpetuating this madness, with hundreds of dollars spent on extravagant gifts and toys, formal portraits, and GODHELPME, pet ducklings and bunnies to ignore after April??? I don’t know, but I’m here to tell her, (politely of course), to fucking STOPPIT– I can’t keep up… Here is what my little dude is getting in his Easter basket this year:

A Crest Spinbrush… The one Santa put in his stocking died & it’s time for a new one! He loved that damned thing– And it counter-acts all the sugary goodies, no?

So many choices! And under $7!

A pack of “Big-Boy” undies… Potty training is going well– Kudos, Kiddo!

There is nothing cuter than a tiny hiney in boxer briefs!

2 Berenstain Bears books– one of our current favorites to watch and to read. We are beefing up his collection a little each “occasion.” He got 2 from his Valentine (Ok, his mommy)… perhaps a couple more at birthday time in June!?

Paperbacks are around $4 on Amazon!

A Dinosaur Stamp set… I found this cool Melissa & Doug one on Totsy a couple months ago for $7.99. But I don’t think they are usually more than $10-$15 at toy retailers!

Supervise– or your furniture, walls, & linens be damned.

Mini boxes of raisins! He thinks it’s candy. Don’t ruin that for me.

A little sugary, but still better than fruit snacks or candies!

Bunny marshmallows– we snack on marshmallows after school. And goodies shaped like bunnies are exponentially more delicious. That’s just science.

NOM NOM NOM

Lollipops! (Aka “Quiet-Makers.”)

These are 10/$1 at CVS! And the sticks are plastic so they don’t get all nasty.

Balloons! (Very cheap entertainment… and way fun in the bath!) Always with supervision of course!

$-Tree Hollaaaa!

Stickers! Because who doesn’t love stickers? (Available at pretty much any drugstore, Wal-mart, Dollar General, etc…) And what? A buck or two?

Heaven knows where these will wind up!

And that’s all, y’all!

My total bunny spendage comes to under $50… (I bought a nice Monogrammed 31Tote last year to reuse every year.) Remember Christmas when you spent $600 and your toddler played with the M&M candy-cane ornament and a ripped giftbag for two days straight?

Cheers to keeping it simple this holiday!

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Need more ideas for keeping it simple for your toddler’s Easter loot?

-bubbles         -crayons/coloring books       -small notebooks/pencils       -matchbox cars        -glowsticks

         -mini goldfish cartons          -nutella go-packs             -small stuffed toys          -mini puzzles

-fruit roll-ups         -letter/number magnets        -sippy cups              -bath squirters          -wind-up toys

          -bubblebath/soaps        -flower seeds/mini pots         -yogurt dots           -play-doh         -sidewalk chalk

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What about you? Do you go all out for Easter or keep it to a dull roar? How do you feel about those pre-stuffed baskets? Convenient or impersonal and lazy? Comment below!

You can also connect with me on Twitter! 

 

Bad parenting advice…

The more time I spend in the blogosphere, the more I love being a part of it. There are tons of “mommy-bloggers” out there just teeming with advice, anecdotes, and best of all, HUMOR. And everybody has their own little schtick… their “claim-to-fame,” if you will, usually quipping something about sarcasm, chocolate, or wine. (Or the trifecta: Sarcastic Wine Drinking Chocolholic SAHMs, sweet Jesus!)

<Transition to valid point…>

From all the wonderful sharing of experiences, I am learning more and more each day that there is no one “right way” to parent. Everybody seems to find what works for them, and usually, as they go along. There simply is no book, column, or forum that has all the answers… but that doesn’t stop me from reading them all! I truly love seeing what techniques and tips have been successful for other families, sometimes trying it out in my own home, and sometimes laughing my ass off, thinking “Yeah– that’s not going to happen.” It seems lately, however, that I am seeing a lot of topics floating about (on Twitter mostly) that make me pause and ask… “Are you people fucking kidding me?” Here are some recent favorite topics I’ve seen regarding marriage, family, and making it work…

What to do when your child refuses to do his chores…

Ummm, Why is this article longer than “Beat his little ass. The end.” I kid… sort of. But seriously, if your child/children feel as if they have a choice in the matter, you’re doing it wrong.

Parenting. You’re doing it right.

My kid won’t eat anything but sweets– Help!

Errr, when did junior start doing the grocery shopping?? Sounds like he’s ahead of the curve! Go ahead, mom! But seriously, last I checked, your 5 year old is not in charge of what gets stored in your pantry or served at your table, right? I don’t even let my husband pick dinner.

Whoops.

 

101 Things to do with your kids on a rainy day!

Did Noah call? Are we to expect an abnormal amount of rain? Because that’s a lot of activities. And most of them are either No-Shit-Sherlock ideas like “watch a movie” … “read stories”–Or inversely horrendous activities that require 36 supplies/ingredients and way more gumption than what I’ve got on a rainy day. How about we alternate napping and playing, Okay? Okay.

Even the dog understands.

50 toys to stimulate your child…

I don’t know about you guys, but my child has been more stimulated by a wooden spoon and a colander than any toy I’ve ever bought him. Refrigerator magnets and a cookie sheet… Or how bout a fistful of coffee filters? Entertainment for hours. So go ahead– buy out Melissa & Doug™ on Zulily. We all do at some point. But he’s going to spend more time blithely entertaining himself with the box it shipped in.

Christmas Day– Case in point.

6 Steps to Avoid Infidelity…

Ok gentlemen, let’s keep this simple. How about lets start with keep your dick out of other women. And for you ladies, no penises not belonging to your spouse allowed. Ok? Now let’s move on.

<Was that crude? My bad.>

I like this guy.

And I’ll close with a collection of my all-time favorite pieces of “New-Parent” advice…

Sleep when the baby sleeps. Make time for yourself. Share parenting responsibilities with your spouse 50/50. Make time to exercise so you feel your best. Use a bottle warmer/steamer to sterilize all small parts, pacifiers, nipples, etc– not just warming bottles! Cook a week’s worth of meals in advance. Keep a journal documenting how many minutes the baby nurses on each side, spends on his tummy, naps, etc. Plan activities that the whole family can participate in so no one feels isolated by baby. RicRac adds a nice personal touch to burp cloths and receiving blankets! 

Oh shut the hell up. Seriously, I draw the line at RicRac.

Ok, so they’re kind of cute. But ain’t nobody got time for that!

 

Wink wink.

So is there any really good advice out there for moms and dads just trying to make it work? Absolutely–do your best and try and relax about fucking up. Because you will. And it’s not that big of a deal. And try not to take anyone’s advice.

 

$10 Awesome Casserole…

Just sharing a quick one this morning… Because anytime my lunch tote (last night’s leftovers) makes me excited for 11:15 to arrive, I think that’s a recipe that ought to be passed along. HA! And the fact that it yields 10 servings for around 10 bucks is pretty sweet on this teacher’s budget! So here it is…

I call it “Cheesy, Beefy, Noodly, Awesomeness.” My 2-year-old calls it Mommy Cassa-wole. Which is just cute.  

Da’ Gredients:

1 lb ground beef (I like 85/15 or better)

Approximately 2 cups pasta of choice (I used rotini, b/c that’s what was open.)

1 can of cheddar cheese <condensed> soup (I used Campbells™>

1 1/2-2 cups frozen peas & carrots (store brand bagged veggies do just fine…and you could use any mix you like, really.)

1 cup sour cream

Shredded cheese for topping (I used some parmesan and cheddar)

Da’rections:

1-Brown ground beef w/ seasoning salt & pepper (I also added garlic and onion powder).

2-Cook your noodles to slightly al dente.

3-In a big ass bowl, mix those two cooked ingredients with all the other stuff. (Yes the vegetables still frozen. Just trust me.)

4-Add a little water it to get a less solid, more “pourable” consistency. Use your casserole experience to judge this one. Remember your frozen vegetables will yield some water during baking, which will cook your noodles the rest of the way.

5-Pour into a (sprayed) 13×9 baking dish of your choice and bake at 400 for 20ish minutes.

             <Remove from oven and admire bubbly goodness>

6- Sprinkle with cheese and place back in the over on broil for 3-5 minutes to get a good melty, golden goodness on top.

TA-friggen-DA!

What you have here is awesome.

It may sound like I just made “hamburger-helper” (eww) way more complicated than it needed to be, but trust me it’s better. And it yields a lot more food. (And without the mystery powder that comes in that box.) Enjoy!

Why Do We Judge Mothers?

Reblogged from It is pretty.:

I am no one’s parent.

The closest I’ve come to giving birth is when I had a laparotomy in 2004 and the nurse who removed my staples asked me “what did you have (boy or girl)?” She was shocked when I said “ten cysts.”

I do not know the kind of love, joy, and pain that comes with being a parent.

Read more… 514 more words

This is a great post from a fellow blogger... As it turns out, "Mean Girls" is more than just a movie. We are too hard on ourselves and eachother...

Good morning, from teacher land…

Alternate title–> COFFEE::COFFEE::COFFEE::COFFEE

In the school I work in, teaching eleventh grade English, we operate on a 4-by-4 block schedule. That means every semester, I get new kids and start my course all over. This is awesome for a lot of reasons… A new motivation and a sense of refueling, a clean-slate fresh start feeling, and a “home-stretch” sort of attitude. (Eventhough we have quite a ways to go!) What I like most about second semester is doing it better than first semester. It’s a shot at eliminating the glitches or the little nuances of a lesson that just didn’t go as planned. Replacing old shit with new shit that works better, if you will…

On the first day I assigned my kiddos a series of journal prompts. This gives me a first look at their writing skills as well as a sneak peek into what they’re all about… I also had fun answering the prompts myself and getting to know my new crew, so I thought I’d share them here too!

I’m a firm believer in…

Manners. The golden rule. Stepping outside your comfort zone. I’m honest enough to say I’m no good at that last one, but I’m still growing.

Three of my favorite things are…

Cooking good food and sharing it. Watching my son learn new things. Puppies. (duh.)

The most afraid I have ever been was when…

On June 12th, 2010, 2 days after my Zac was born, the Women’s Center at the hospital said I could go home… with my baby. Like, to raise him. They didn’t even ask me if I knew what I was doing. I didn’t.

The last movie I saw was…

BAAAHAHAHAHA. Yes.

So long ago I don’t remember? Unless you count the 348 times I have alternated Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory & Babe in the past few months.

 

One thing I can’t stand is…

Basic lack of consideration. Hypocrisy. Gum chewing. (All of these make you look stupid.)

A short term goal I have is… A long term goal I have is…

Make it to 6 months breast-feeding our May 21 coming attraction… being pre-pregnancy weight/size by Christmas 2013. I suppose those are both rather short-sighted. But as a busy working mommy, I feel like Friday is 100 years from now. That’s as “long-term” as I can muster!

 

That’s all from me today… Happy Monday. Blah blah blah.

Click this pic to vote for me! Please!

(Please share in the comments your response to any or all of these starters!)

It’s an honor to be nominated…

No seriously. It is.

VOTE FOR ME…”Circle of Moms”  TOP 25 FUNNY MOMS 2013!

Just click the badge on the right. And if you think of it, visit every day and click again! YAY!

Thanks for your support, friends!

VOTE FOR MY MOM… and I’ll love you THIIISSS BIG!

It’s a BOY!

Baby Perry #2 is a HE!

I hesitate to use the word “relieved” to describe my feelings when I spotted a little baby winkie on the gray, fuzzy ultrasound screen yesterday… but the sound “SHEW!” might have quietly escaped me… probably only noticeable because I was previously holding my breath. And sweating. Little girls are beautiful gifts from God and daddy’s reason for breathing… and their clothes are waaaay more  fun. I get all that. But I’m a “Boy Mom.” I don’t need to clearly define this for other boy moms… but for the rest of you, allow me to elaborate. But not much, because boys are simple that way.

Mud up to your neck and a frog in your pocket? No prob. That’s why we have a garden hose– now march your hind parts back outside.

Emotional crisis over missing Barbie shoe?  I don’t know how to tell you that mommy vacuumed it up because she knows you have 212 of them and didn’t want to bend down. Please try to cope with 211.

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Ice cream down the front of your polo?  It’s cool- we have 19 more and you don’t care if it perfectly matches. Or even fits.

Can’t wear this jumper because the “bow doesn’t go” and Hello Kitty is so last season? Get a grip and a job, then we’ll talk season. Kisses!

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Trains, trucks, tractors, & rubber dinosaurs. Aaah simplicity…

Bratz™, Monster High™ (tramps), Various dolls that piss. Hmmm.

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Teenage boys who open the door for their mother…

Teenage girls who slam it in their face.

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Tux rental… WHOLE FRICKEN WEDDING.

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One penis to worry about… ALLLL the penises to worry about.

 

Happy mommy!

So it may be true that for the time being with a house full of little boy stuff, I am run a little more ragged. I clean up bigger messes. And I have less fun shopping. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m a BOY MOM.

Healthy is really all that matters!

EXCITED BIG BRUDDER!

 

 

 

 

 

 

**DISCLAIMER**  I am well aware that not all girls are prisspots.  And not all of them turn into evil teenage bitches. (Ok most of then do that, admit it.) I’m simply sharing some levity about the joys of mothering boys, rocks in my washing machine and all… So if your britches are all in a bunch because you know how awesome your daughter is, pipe down. I know girls come with their magic too! I am one, remember?